Hello,
Years ago in philosophy class I learned that Epicurus counted romantic love as a vainglory (ie: an unnatural, unnecessary pleasure), equating it with other ego-driven illusionary pleasures like demanding a specific piece of cake or building statues to oneself. Now I've decided to write an article to set the record straight (https://www.pureloveshop.com/2020/11/29/rom…ot-a-vainglory/). However, I begin feel like I am fighting an opponent built of straws. I find evidence that Epicurus was against lust-driven relationships, but I see nothing where he calls romantic love a vainglory. I found this post by Cassius https://newepicurean.com/love-marriage-…e-modern-world/, which reminded me of Epicurus's faith in friendship and confirmed my vague memory that Epicurus had not been against marriage (the wise man may or may not marry). And I do not find anything where Epicurus calls romantic love a vainglory. I really begin to wonder if it wasn't so much romantic love that Epicurus disapproved of as placing sexual desire above friendship. But is there a place where Epicurus discusses romance and sexuality in terms of vainglories? Is there a place where he draws comparisons between needing a specific piece of cake (as opposed to the natural pleasure of desiring something sweet) and needing a specific sexual partner (as opposed to the natural pleasure of desiring sex)?