This is one of the primary differences in the flavors of ancient Epicurean Philosophy versus contemporary Utilitarianism, both being hedonistic, but with different emphases on the happiness of an association of friends versus the collective happiness of the masses
And I would not hesitate to say that this is both (1) an example of regression in philosophy over 2000 years and (2) why I would be cautious about endorsing Bentham or applying the label of "hedonism" to Epicurus overbroadly. Epicurus was firm that there is no supernatural basis for considering everyone the equivalent of a brother and sister, or reason to ignore that in reality many people hate each other. No one wins any points in heaven or anywhere else for getting themselves killed in the name of abstract notions of the brotherhood of all men. Rather, just as almost happened to the Epicurean in Lucian's Alexander story, it is very easy to get oneself killed unnecessarily if you ignore the realities of your context. In the meantime while we work for better contexts it pays to pay attention to the reality of how far your circle of friends really extends.